Part 1 — The Truth That Gets Quieted
When Celebration Becomes a Cover
Special needs parenting is often celebrated and it should be. There is so much joy. So much unexpected light. So much resilience. But if I’m being honest, sometimes the celebration feels like a cover. A way to talk about the beautiful parts without saying what’s also true.
Because the truth is………..this is hard.
It’s hard on our kids, who are constantly navigating systems not built for them. It’s hard on us, who are managing care, therapy, insurance, school meetings, and emotional landmines, all without a map. It’s hard on our marriages. On our other children. On our health. On our peace.
And no, we don’t take a picture of our marriage quietly unraveling under the pressure. Or our other daughter’s needs being passed over because she’s learned how to disappear in the name of empathy. We don’t post the 38,485th time we repeat the same direction to Harlow because her brain needs it, and the world doesn’t slow down for her to catch up.
This kind of weight doesn’t photograph well.
It’s not shameful. It’s sacred. And sometimes, it’s just too much to explain
There are days when the pressure is so high, I wonder if two homes would be easier than one.
Not because I want that but because being a great partner, on top of being an advocate, caregiver, and human, feels impossible some days.
And that’s what no one talks about. We glorify the strength, but we quiet the struggle.
I’m not sharing this for pity. I’m sharing it because telling the truth is love too. Because not naming it doesn’t make it go away, it just makes us feel more alone in it.
This isn’t just about special needs parenting. This is about the mental and emotional load so many of us carry. This is about the pressure to hold everything together without showing a crack.
This is the first piece in a five-part series about the things we carry but rarely say out loud.
Up next: The pressure to keep it all together. What it really costs to be the “strong one” all the time.
If you’re holding more than anyone knows, this space is for you.
And so is my coaching.
